On Monday, Dec. 15, I knew I had to get the news ready as my daughter, Kathy Carnevale, had a very relaxing day planned for me and her daughter, Kassi Neal.

We started the day out by having lunch at a new Mexican restaurant in the Delaware Plaza. Then we went to a salon and had a pedicure and a manicure.

I never get my nails done as I usually break them in no time.

We were completely ready to face the holiday after all this attention.

I knew Tuesday, Dec. 16, was going to be a stressful day. My daughter, Marcia Pangburn, had a suppression hearing scheduled for the Berne town court.

I went to the orthopedic doctor and got my cortisone shot. I talked with the P.A. about the shots because I don’t think they’re helping anymore. He scheduled me for an appointment with Dr. Abraham in February.

I didn’t have time for lunch and the hearing was very long. It lasted more than three hours, but there was a short recess.

I am always used to eating something. I wish I had packed an energy bar. I came home tired and hungry, and not feeling well.

On Wednesday, Dec. 17, I wasn’t feeling well at all. All this trouble Marcia got in for crying at 2 a.m. in the cemetery has taken a toll on me.

I’m sad at Christmas because I miss Ray playing Elvis’s “Blue Christmas” on the outside speakers as the family approaches for dinner, and I miss Danny donning the Santa Claus suit in the garage, and giving all the young children a surprise from the North Pole.

On the other hand, I’m very happy for all my family and I look forward to being with them on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.

I mailed out two family calendars to Ray’s two sisters, Betty in Whitehall and Norma in Middle Granville. They always tell me it’s their best Christmas present, and that encourages me to make them happy in his memory.

Later, in the day I went on the dinner visit with Brandon. Children always make life happy.

Nichole and Samson are all excited to be spending this Christmas Eve with Dad and participating in the Nativity in the Barn.

I was feeling better by evening.

Thursday, Dec. 18, I was tired from all the stress. I wrote out more Christmas cards, but then the world fell apart for all of us in the Hilltowns.

The news was all about the abduction of a little five-year-old boy, Kenneth White.

Fear set in and we all prayed for his safe return. Doors were kept locked and we didn’t know who the masked men could be.

On Friday, Dec. 19, we awoke to the news that little Kenneth White had been murdered. Sadness everywhere.

My daughter, Marcia called me at 2 p.m. She had left work at noon feeling very ill. She went to the doctor’s and was on medicine for an upper respitory infection. Again, I think stress causes illness.

On Saturday, Dec. 20, I got all my Christmas presents wrapped. I had to stop and put my feet up after every two presents.

I wrapped an American girl doll for Nichole. Anyone who knows Nichole knows she loves dolls. For Iain, I wrapped a leather jacket, and a Michael Jackson dance tape. Iain idolizes Michael Jackson. Then Samson will get two Lego sets, and an XB360 game. Moneywise it came out the same.

I gave Kyra money towards an IPod and I gave Danielle money to buy Zoey a stuffed horse.

The adults all get family calendars and old family VCR tapes made into DVDs.

Sunday, Dec. 21, was the most important day of the year for Nichole. She turned nine and wanted to go bowling because she said that’s what Kyra likes to do. Brandon picked Samson and Nichole up at 1 p.m., and we had until 4 p.m.

Jenn Smith was there and Marcia and Kyra. Bowling was fun at the Cobleskill lanes. We ate pizza and had soda.

Brandon bought cupcakes ahead of time and we sang “Happy Birthday”. The bowling alley gave Nichole her own real bowling pin with Happy Birthday Nichole written on it.

That seemed to be a special keepsake for her. She took it to her mom’s house and said she will bring it back and forth.

What a week, deep sadness at times, and great joy at other times. I will cherish the best, and let the rest go.